One Year Becomes One Thousand
by Unintentional Emo Kid
Summary: One year has passed since the death of Sirius. Remus is haunted by nightmares of his friend's death. Is friends all that they really were? Slash, SB/RL. One-Shot.


A/N: This is what happens late at night. I outlined this last night and started just typing away as soon as I woke up. It's not getting continued, and yes, it contains slash. Don't be immature.

These characters are definitely not mine.

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One year. It felt like a thousand had passed. _I can't keep going on like this, _Remus thought, sitting up in bed. Another nightmare had shaken peaceful sleep. His heart was hammering in his chest; threatening to break through it. He swung his legs out of the bed and his feet found his slippers on the floor. He grabbed his robe from the side of his bed, and clutching it around him for warmth, set up the stairs of Grimmauld Place.

He'd climbed two flights before reaching his destination. Standing outside the bedroom door, he traced his finger over the name. Sirius. How much Remus still needed him; wanted him here. He stared at the door a long time before reaching forward and pushing open the door.

The room inside was desolate and foreboding. Remus had been in here every night since Sirius' death. He walked in and it felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. The scent of this room – Sirius' scent – still clung to everything. A picture on the wall of the room caught his eye.

It was the four of them. James, Peter, Sirius and Remus. A small smile formed on his mouth as he watched it. James was messing his hair up with his hand; Peter was bouncing around excitedly, not believing he was really included; Sirius – it pained Remus to see his face – had his arms around his two best friends; and Remus, looking tired, but happy, laughing as he ducked Peter.

Remus remembered that day like it was yesterday. It was their last day at Hogwarts. Lily had taken the picture and was, of course, laughing with the rest of us. It was the last hurrah for the Marauders. Who knew it would be the last time they were truly together?

Tearing his eyes away from the picture, Remus turned to face Sirius' bed. A fresh wave of grief hit him just looking at it. It had only been one year since its owner had been in it. One year since the first night it laid empty, cold, forgotten. Remus sat down on the edge. He could still fell Sirius here. Here, in this room; in this bed.

Remus fell into other memories. He'd relived these memories so often that he'd almost forgotten they were real.

**Flashback**

_**This storm is getting ridiculous, **_**Remus thought dipping his quill in ink. He'd been trying to finish this Herbology essay for almost two hours. The thunder was distracting him and if it wasn't the thunder, it was Sirius on the bed next to him randomly shooting balls of parchment at his head. He shook his head angrily as another one came flying at him. **

**"Okay, Sirius! That's ENOUGH!" Remus shouted, the last two hours of pent up frustration exploding out. **

**"Jeez, Moony, you're no fun." Sirius looked sullen. Normally that look would have made him feel guilty. Not today. Remus was way to behind on his homework. Seventh year was really taking its toll on him. **

**"Well, Padfoot, if you'd stop throwing parchment balls at me, I'd be able to get this essay done. Then I'd probably be more fun." The anger in Remus' voice was evident. It abated some as Sirius shifted and lay face down on the bed next to him. "Thank you. Give me twenty minutes, and I'll have it done." **

**Remus heard Sirius sigh and smiled to himself. Sirius was so…so – there wasn't even a word for what Sirius was. He was just Sirius. **

**Twenty minutes later, Remus not only had his essay done, but the rest of his homework as well. He shot a glance over at Sirius, who was staring at him with the maniacal grin he got just before playing a prank on someone. **

**"Padfoot, why are you looking at me like that?" Remus was frightened, Sirius' pranks were often harmful.**

**Then, without warning, Sirius' jumped off his bed and landed on Remus, tackling him on the mattress. **

**"Get – off – me!" Remus gasped. Sirius was heavier than he looked. **

**James had walked in. Neither of the boys on the mattress had noticed. **

**"Padfoot, what in the world are you doing to Moony?" He asked with his eyebrows raised. Sirius jumped about a foot when he heard James' voice. **

**"I was – uh – you know, I really don't know. I suppose that's what comes out of boredom." He gave Remus a look.**

**The three boys burst out laughing. **

**End flashback**

Remus lay facedown on Sirius' old bed now. That memory was one that had always made him laugh when he thought of Sirius. Now it only made grief wash over him. The only good thing to be said about it was that it made him feel like Sirius wasn't so far away.

Remus stared at the floor, lost in more memories, when something between the mattress and the nightstand caught his eye. It was a piece of parchment, folded like a letter. _That's odd, _Remus thought, _Sirius' only correspondence was Harry, why wouldn't he have sent this? _ He reached over and slid it out from it's hiding place. When he unfolded it he read:

_My Dearest Moony, _

_ It's been years since we'd been together at Hogwarts. Since we'd shared a dormitory. In those 7 years we were together that way, we shared more than just a school, a dormitory, and the occasional article of clothing. We shared a life. A life I want back. _

_I miss having you in the same room with me, where I can hear your breathing. I miss the way you'd become terrified when a small spider would spin its web above your bed. I remember how you'd used to jump into my arms and not leave until I'd killed it. _

_It goes without saying that it was difficult to hold a terrified werewolf and kill a spider at the same time. There were points where I didn't want to kill the spider, just so I wouldn't have to let you go. _

_Obviously you can see my point now, Remus. I love you. _

_ -Sirius_

Remus couldn't believe his eyes. The parchment was old. Years old. _Why didn't he ever tell me? Why? _Remus couldn't control himself now.

"Sirius, why didn't you ever tell me?" Remus' hoarse voice was a mixture of surprise and anger, "You prat, I love you, too."

That's when he realized what Sirius had been trying to do that day in the dormitory. And for the first time in about a year, Remus actually slept.

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Please review. Let me know what you think, how it can be improved; anything, really.


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